Here are two tell tale signs that you, my friend, are a grown-up.

Ahem. First of all:

• Hatchback vehicles start to look attractive. Think of all the practicality of owning a station wagon!

Secondly,

• There are ton of sitcoms and primetime shows that look like they may be really good to you. YOU, my friend are a grown-up and the advertising is directed TOWARDS YOU!

Someone appreciates my skillz.

I was driving (just the other day) and in Minneapolis when you merge onto to highways there are quicker entrances for the car pool lane to enter the road. I was with Ella so I grabbed the quick car pool way. Right before entering the highway, the car pool lane merges with the average single person lane. I squeezed my car in between to cars that were in that lane. I may have caused the guy behind me to have to hit his breaks and slow down, but HEY, MY LANE WAS ENDING!!! Anyways, I watched him from the rear view mirror- scowling, yelling and clapping for me. I thought it was pretty great driving too! Thanks buddy!

A Shameful Matter for MATT: THE KING OF ALL THINGS THAT ROCK.

The other day I made a comment to Matt that was SO blasphemous, SO OUTRAGEOUS that you would have thought that I would have told him that not only is he not Ella’s dad, but that her dad was GEORGE BUSH!!!!

I made the comparison that the band Queen was like Led Zeppelin. I think they sound similar. He told me that the comment was completely and utterly shocking and told me never to repeat that to anyone again. And for those of you, who are ignorant and uninformed like me, according to MATT: KING OF ALL THINGS THAT ROCK, Led Zeppelin is super super duper cool, and Queen is just all right.

As people know, I think I am hilarious. I laugh at my shit all the time. In the car the other day, We Are the Champions by Queen came on and I called Matt and stuck the phone on the radio. I snickered at myself the rest of the ride home. I am not sure how long this shameful matter will go on- but CHRISSY: QUEEN OF ALL THINGS THAT DON’T ROCK will put up fight. This one is for you Queen- you are just as cool as Led Zeppelin and I’m here to spread the word.

Go jump in a lake.

I’ve pretty much made it a rule never to write blogs on Mondays. I’m such a grouch. All I ever want to do is complain in Monday posts and really, who wants to read that. I’m in a better mood today. I had a GREAT WEEKEND! My mom’s house is awesome! I swam in a lake all weekend. I was def. not planning on getting a tan this weekend. I don’t know how much help I actually was to my mom- but I do think everyone had a lot of fun this weekend! The only thing that sucked was the drive home. It was pretty shitty. But its over!!! I think we made a decision today not have CrossTrain housing in our house anymore (that is where we have weird people from Matts work stay with us ALL THE TIME for a small check every month.) Its getting to be a bit to much. I’m getting to be a bit insane. The End. I would rather get a second job than do it anymore. I have stories behind the madness but just as I make it a rule of thumb not to write about my work, I also don’t talk about Matt’s work. So… ask me about it. Anyways, since I don’t have the Internet at home AGAIN we will see how my blogductivity will be this week. Ciao!

There’s a snake in my boot…

Howdy Howdy Howdy. I just went and picked up new cell phones for Matty and me. We finally qualified for new phones (with a million small stipulations) so I went and hooked us up at the new AT&T. We now have Mpls numbers so if you are one of the few who are blessed with my old number (it sounds much cooler that way than if I say, “If you are one of the few who know me, and call me”) and I don’t text you in the next couple days with a new number, email me and remind me!

No bloggin’ this weekend. I will be at a super hot resort location as I previously mentioned. El PatsyandSteve-o’s. Only the elite are invited.

The good news is that we have the internet again! Oh how I have missed thee. I’ve wasted hours this week cleaning when I could have been on Craigslist trolling for cheap plant stands. Sigh.

Have a good weekend.

I’m turning into my sister-

with this whole no-blogging hiatus. JK. Here are a couple highlights of my awesome life.
- I’m on a Target de-tox. My Target trips were becoming a big problem. SO- No Target until October 14th. I know its hard to believe but they sell deoderant and shampoo at grocery store. You really don’t NEED to go to Target for that stuff.
- Going to Kansas with the fam this weekend to help my mom move into her new place. I’m kind of excited!
- Matt has agreed to a D O G as long as it doesn’t shed. Shedless dogs, in general, are pricey. And FrouFrou. So the dog search may be a while (when we become rich). He’ll probably add Barkless, Hypoallergenic, and Ergonomical to the list of Desirable dog traits too.
- We have no internet at home- I have never wanted to go on Internet De-tox. It’s been rough. Pray for us… and our modem.

This is your mission… if you choose to accept it…

I have been thinking about pets alot lately for two reasons. First of all my Brothers/Mother’s dog Sable died this weekend. She was the SWEETEST dog in the world. I feel really sad that she is gone- she left fast though and kind of in a mystery. It sounds like she just kind of went to sleep. She was a good puppy. :(

I want a dog. I want a cat too. BUT Matt and me have both seemed to become progressively allergic to cats so I’m afraid to fall in love with one only to have to get rid of it. So, no cats. We have talked about getting a dog in the past but there have always been too many obstacles. We always had good reasons for not getting one. First of all, we never could really afford a pet. Hell, we could barely afford ourselves these last couple years. Now, I think we could shell out the cash it costs to own a dog. Secondly, we have always traveled a lot, and I didn’t know what to do with the dog. Well, now we still do travel alot but mostly in the car, and both of our parents (where we ussually go) live in the country now where there is plenty of space to bring a dog along. Plus, I have a cousin in town now who can watch the beast while we are gone. Lastly, we have never had space for a dog. Dogs need space. Now we have space WITH a fenced in backyard. Last problem… Matt. He doesn’t want one. But then again he didn’t necessarily want a kid either and look how much he’s digging being a dad! SO, here is the plan folks. Someone should buy us a dog (a really cute one! not too small! Medium sized! No hounddog!) and come and drop it off at our house with a note saying it has nowhere else to go and that it needs a home. Then Matt will have to say yes and fall in love with the puppy. Just email me if you are up to the task. Ella needs a puppy dog friend.

Blame it on the Matt.

Everyone can blame Matt for my lack of posting lately. He took the camera cord to work last week and seems to be holding it hostage. I had big plans to write a blog showing the damage to the Kia and also showing our new car. That post is on hold until further notice.

Also I did indeed dye my hair this weekend (and worked out… grumble grumble). It is not exactly blonde but more of a dark brunette bleached out look… like what some people call orange! The good news is that Ella had never had a mom with orange hair before either!

One last note: I once read that if you put to much hair product in your hair (like pomade) baby powder was a good fix. IT WORKS! I was a little overboard this morning with the goop and I did fix it will baby powder. File that one away. 

Shame on me.

You know what is a shame? That Ella has never had a mom without a big fat butt… I think I will work out right now. You know what else is a shame? Ella has never had a mom with blonde hair before… I think I will dye my hair right now… and then work out…

Fashion Forward

I have been really digging this summer’s babydoll top style. It is the kind of shirt that cinches under the chest and is longer than lots of other shirts. It is basically a perfect disguise for my freaky mom-tummy. And I thought I looked cute. I MAY have been fooling myself. I went to a lunch with some other volunteer coordinators yesterday; we do lunch every six months or so to… uh… coordinate shit. I was wearing my favorite Target clearance babydoll shirt and the first thing I notice is both of the women look at my stomach. I am pretty sure they thought I was pregnant. But as one of my co-workers said, “Maternity is IN this year!”. I’m so hip. Writing about pregnancy reminded me about an article I read in The Onion last week. I am posting it for your pleasure. PS: Minneapolis has free The Onion all over the city- every week! PSS: That was to make you jealous.

Woman Overjoyed By Giant Uterine Parasite